The peek blog
Ideas for exploring together
Honest, shame-free guides on desire, connection and trying new things as a couple.
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Dirty talk with a long-term partner feels so silly
Dirty talk with a long-term partner feels silly after years of bins and school runs. Small, gradual steps to find a voice that's yours, no script required.
Start with a guide
The big questions couples ask, each answered in one place with every article we have written on it.
Out of practice after kids
The hardest part is behind you and you are both surfacing. Nothing is wrong. You just have to find each other again.
How to give your partner a sensual massage at home
How to give your partner a sensual massage: warm the oil, set the room, go slower than feels natural and let it land wherever it lands. No expertise needed.
Kids at the grandparents tonight? Make it yours
A whole child-free night at home is rare. Plan it so it feels like yours: tease it from the morning, keep the evening playful and drop the pressure.
Quickies or slow sex: which do busy parents need?
Quickies or slow sex? Busy parents need both. Why letting sex come in different sizes makes it easier to say yes, and to start again after a long gap.
How to make your partner feel desired, not thanked
Appreciation says thanks for what you do. Desire says I want you. Ten small, specific ways to make your partner feel wanted again, not just appreciated.
Both waiting for the other to initiate? Here's why
Both waiting for the other to initiate? It's rarely a lack of desire. Reaching first feels exposed, so nobody does. Take the first move away and it melts.
Intimate things to do together besides sex
Sex or nothing, usually at 10pm when you're both wrecked? Intimate things to do together besides sex, and why a wider menu gives the wanting room to come back.
I miss being close to my partner after kids
You love your partner, but after kids you quietly miss being close and reaching over feels like pressure. Here's a low-stakes way back, no going first.
How to be intimate again after having a baby
You became a brilliant parenting team and near-strangers in bed. Here's a gentle, low-pressure way back to the physical side after a baby, no big talk needed.
Keep intimacy alive when a partner travels for work
A warm, science-backed guide to keeping intimacy alive when your partner travels for work, using the distance itself as fuel instead of the flat that follows.
Bring back kissing in a long-term relationship
Whatever happened to making out for the sake of it? Here is how to bring back kissing in a long-term relationship, without it turning into a whole thing.
No time for sex until life settles down? It won't
You keep saying you'll be intimate once life calms down, but calm never comes. Here's why waiting backfires and how to build closeness inside the chaos instead.
Don't feel sexy anymore? How to get it back
Don't feel sexy anymore and want it back? Here's how to feel like yourself again, grounded in how desire actually works, minus the pressure or performance.
New year resolutions for couples' intimacy
Skip the willpower. The relationship new year resolutions for couples that actually stick are small, repeatable moments of presence, not a grand plan.
Does the Six-Second Kiss Work? What It Actually Does
Does the six second kiss work, or is it a gimmick? Here's what a six-second kiss actually does for couples out of practice, and how to make it land.
Don't feel sexy after having a baby? You're normal
Your body changed after kids and you don't feel sexy or like yourself in bed. Here's why that's self-criticism, not your body, and a low-pressure way back in.
No privacy for sex with kids in the house? Start here
No privacy for sex with kids in the house? That's not a flaw, it's parenthood. Here's how to protect a small, guarded pocket of ten minutes anyway.
No sex drive with young kids? It's normal
Having no sex drive with young kids is a normal phase, not a verdict on the relationship. Here's why it happens and the low-key way couples find their way back.
Feel like parents, not partners? 5 small ways back
Feel more like a parenting team than a couple? It's normal after kids. 5 small, low-pressure ways to feel like partners again, no big serious talk needed.
Touched out and don't want sex? Here's why
Touched by kids all day and can't stand one more hand on you by bedtime? Here's what's actually going on, and the low-pressure way back to wanting it.
Why laughing together is good for your sex life
Why laughing together is good for your sex life, and how a bit of shared silliness brings back the closeness and desire buried under bath time and bills.
How to make your partner feel appreciated
The small, specific, everyday ways to make your partner feel appreciated, so noticing beats one big gesture and it stops being a one-person job.
6 fun ways to flirt with your long-term partner
A bit out of practice? 6 easy, low-pressure ways to flirt with your long-term partner again, from a held glance to a text that isn't admin, minus the cringe.
How to make date night exciting again, even at home
Date night feeling flat? 3 simple ways to make date night exciting again at home, with no babysitter and no big plan, so it feels like the two of you again.
How to build anticipation in a relationship: 5 ways
How to create anticipation with your partner again: 5 playful ways to bring back the slow build of wanting each other, from a 2pm text to a wait on purpose.
How to make intimacy fun again, not a chore
A warm, science-backed guide to making intimacy fun again when it's started to feel like one more thing on the list, without pressure or a big serious talk.
How busy parents make time for intimacy, not a chore
Make room for intimacy without it turning into another to-do. A warm, science-backed guide for tired parents on keeping closeness playful and low-pressure.
Is it normal to feel out of practice with a partner?
Feeling out of practice with a partner you love is normal, and it's a context thing, not a you-two thing. Here's how to warm back up without the big talk.
Why desire doesn't come back when life calms down
You've finally got room to breathe, so why hasn't wanting each other come back? Because it doesn't reboot on its own. Here's how to coax it back, gently.
Reopen intimacy without a big conversation
A low-stakes way to reopen intimacy with your partner, so closeness comes back through small shared moments instead of one big loaded sit-down talk.
How to reconnect with your partner after kids
Finding your way back to each other after kids, so closeness comes back on its own instead of feeling forced or scheduled or like one more chore.
Close, but barely touching
You talk about everything. Intimacy quietly moved above the waist and neither of you said anything.
Romantic weekend away ideas for couples: go strange
Romantic weekend away ideas for couples who've mastered the nice trip: go somewhere new to you both, where nobody knows you, with one surprise each.
Novelty in a gay relationship, without opening up
Craving something new but opening up isn't you two? Here's how long-term gay couples find novelty inside the relationship: new places, roles and ideas to try.
Sex scripts: how queer couples write their own
What is a sex script, and why do long-term queer couples rewrite theirs? How to write your own sex script together and stay curious about each other.
More attracted to your partner in their element?
Watching your partner do what they're great at can make you want them all over again. Here's why a little distance feeds desire and how to catch it more often.
We're comfortable. How do we get adventurous again?
You're comfortable and close but you miss the spark of discovery. Here's how to be more adventurous in a long-term relationship without making it a whole thing.
Too shy to tell your partner what turns you on
Too shy to tell your partner what turns you on? Here's how to let the shy wants surface privately, so nobody has to say the cringe part out loud first.
Is a couples intimacy app private, really?
Is a couples intimacy app private, or is your sex life sitting on a server? Here's what peek actually stores, and why privacy is what makes honesty possible.
Comfortable but is it too late to want more?
Comfortable but wondering if it's too late to want more from your relationship? It isn't. Here's why coasting dulls desire, and the small way back in.
How to tell my partner a fantasy I'm scared to share
How to tell your partner a fantasy you're a little scared to say out loud, without the exposed feeling of going first or risking it landing wrong.
The best intimacy app for gay couples, honestly
Wondering if peek is weird for two guys? It isn't. Here's who peek is actually built for, and why the private-swipe app works for gay couples too.
Aftercare for established couples, years in
Wanting aftercare years into a relationship doesn't mean anything's wrong. Here's how to ask for it small and low stakes, no summit meeting required.
Long-term gay relationship, low sex? You're normal
A long-term gay relationship with low sex isn't a red flag, it's a script nobody handed you. Here's why the spark cools and a low-key way to bring it back.
We talk about everything except sex: how to start
You talk about everything except sex, and this is the low-stakes way in for couples who tell each other everything else, minus this one thing.
Emotionally close but no physical intimacy: why
You're best friends who barely touch anymore, and you can't pinpoint when that happened. Here's the real reason, and a low-key way to bring the spark back.
The honeymoon is over
A year or two in, and you can see the shape of a routine forming. Asking for something different feels riskier than it did.
Intimate first anniversary ideas beyond dinner
Intimate first anniversary ideas that go past a nice dinner: day-one confessions, a first date with a twist and a secret wish swap that can become your ritual.
Are we sexually compatible, or do we grow into it?
Wondering if you're sexually compatible? For most couples it's built, not found. Here's how couples grow their overlap by exploring together, early or years in.
Code words for sex: 25 ideas couples actually use
Code words for sex couples really use, from "documentary?" to "early night?", plus ones for not tonight and how to invent a private language of your own.
Yes, no, maybe list for couples: should you make one?
A yes, no, maybe list is a checklist where you each mark what you're into, curious about or not up for. Here's how it works and the snag nobody mentions.
Why does wanting each other take effort now?
Wanting each other taking effort after year one is normal, not the magic dying. Why desire shifts from spontaneous to responsive, and why intention helps.
What counts as kinky in a relationship?
What counts as kinky in a relationship? The line is blurrier than you think, and it matters less than you'd hope. Here's why the label isn't the point.
Does birth control lower libido? What to notice
Does birth control lower libido? Sometimes, quietly. Here's how to tell if your pill shifted your baseline, and what to do that doesn't start with a big talk.
How to tell your partner something isn't working
How to tell your partner something isn't working sexually without it landing as a criticism, so you get closer instead of defensive. A kinder script.
Comparing your relationship to couples online
Comparing your relationship to couples on social media is a rigged game: that hot couple on your feed is a highlight reel, not a baseline. Here's how to stop.
Is a weekly relationship check-in worth it? Honestly
Is a weekly relationship check-in worth it, or just too clinical for a couple who's fine? A warmer, lower-stakes version that doesn't feel like a meeting.
Phones in the Bedroom Ruining Intimacy? Not Anymore
Phones in the bedroom ruining intimacy without either of you meaning it to? Here's how to get the room back without a rule, a fight or a whole big talk.
Sex the same way every time? 5 ways to shake it up
Is your sex the same every time? Totally normal a year or so in. 5 easy ways to break the routine (when, where, who starts and more) without a big talk.
Honeymoon phase over after a year? Here's why
Honeymoon phase over after a year? That's not a red flag, it's the schedule. Here's what's really going on and a low-key way to keep the charge alive.
What couples with great sex lives have in common
The habits couples with great sex lives actually share, and why it has almost nothing to do with frequency, technique or being naturally spontaneous.
Is curiosity the secret to lasting attraction?
Curiosity keeps attraction alive because it makes a familiar partner feel new again. Here's how staying curious keeps you wanting each other for years.
Why playing games together makes couples closer
Why playing games together makes couples closer, and how a bit of play sneaks past the awkward talk to build real intimacy when the honeymoon settles down.
How to explore fantasies together as a couple
Fun, low-stakes ways to explore fantasies together as a couple without the awkward conversation, so sharing what you want feels like play instead of a big talk.
The best question games for couples to feel closer
The best question games for couples who want to feel closer without a heavy talk, plus how to keep the ritual going once the honeymoon novelty wears off.
Daily habits to stay connected as a couple
Small daily habits to stay connected as a couple, so intimacy stays alive when the honeymoon levels off, without a heavy talk or a whole new routine.
Am I overthinking our sex life? Probably not
Worried you care too much about your sex life this early? You're not overthinking it. Tending something good before it wobbles is just paying attention.
5 early signs your relationship is drifting apart
Drifting apart rarely starts with a fight. The 5 quiet early signs, from admin-only chats to missed bids, and one small weekly habit that catches it early.
How to keep sex from becoming the same routine
Noticing the same script quietly forming in bed? Here's how to sneak fresh discovery back in early, while the pattern's still soft enough to nudge.
Is it normal for sex to slow down after year one?
Sex slowing down after year one is completely normal, not a red flag. Why the honeymoon dip happens and how to keep the spark without a serious conversation.
Say what you want without sounding critical
How to tell your partner what you want in bed without it sounding like a criticism, so you can invite something new instead of grading what you already do.
Together a long time, lovers less often
Every reach risks a no, so you stopped reaching. Talking has not fixed it. You need a mechanism, not another conversation.
Sensate focus: what it is and how to try it at home
Sensate focus is turn-taking touch with sex off the table for a while. Here's what it is, why dropping the goal lowers the pressure and a gentle way to try it.
How to sext your partner after years together
How to sext a partner you've been with for years: one small, true message at 2pm with nothing booked on the back of it, so nobody has to go first in person.
I'm the woman who wants sex more. Is that normal?
Wanting sex more than he does is common for women, not a flaw in either of you. Why the script gets it wrong, and how to want out loud without another no.
Good enough sex: why aiming lower actually helps
Good enough sex is flexible sex that's sometimes great and sometimes just nice. When desire doesn't match, dropping the perfect bar takes the pressure off.
How to keep desire alive in a long-term relationship
The wanting went quiet years ago and you've quietly become roommates. Here's how to keep desire alive in a long relationship by tending it, not waiting for it.
How to find your way back after a rough patch
Things went quiet after a rough patch and now you're more flatmates than lovers. Here's a low-pressure, rejection-proof way back to each other, no big talk.
Can my partner see what I swiped on peek?
Can your partner see what you swiped on a couples app like peek? Not unless you match. Here's what stays private, what a match shows and why that matters.
When affection feels like pressure for sex
When affection feels like pressure for sex, every cuddle carries a question. Here's why touch got loaded and a lower-stakes way to hold each other again.
Does my antidepressant lower my sex drive?
Does your antidepressant lower your sex drive, or is it you? Here's how SSRIs act as a brake on desire, what's really going on and a gentler way back in.
How to talk about our sex life without a fight
How to bring up your sex life without triggering the same old standoff. A calmer, rejection-proof way in for couples who keep having the same painful talk.
Perimenopause low libido: what helps when desire dips
Perimenopause low libido: what helps when the wanting quietly disappears. Why your desire went responsive, not broken, and a low-pressure way back to it.
Why your partner shuts down when you talk about sex
When your partner shuts down every time you talk about sex, the wall is protection, not rejection. Here's a lower-stakes way in that skips the big talk.
How to make up after a fight about sex, honestly
How to make up after a fight about sex: mend the connection first and leave the sex for later. A calmer way back for couples stuck in the same painful loop.
How to say no to sex nicely without the rejection
How to say no to sex nicely without your partner hearing it as rejection. A warmer no for couples stuck in the same painful loop, plus a way to skip it.
Feeling guilty for not wanting sex as much?
Feeling guilty for wanting sex less than your partner does? Here's why the guilt is what's dialling your desire down, and a lower-pressure way back in.
Pursuer distancer sex: why chasing backfires
Why do you chase harder the more they pull away, and why does it backfire? What's feeding the reach-and-retreat loop, and a calmer way out for both of you.
Keeping score of who initiates sex (and how to stop)
Keeping a mental tally of who initiates sex? Why the scorekeeping starts, why it makes every no feel heavier and how to stop counting without a big talk.
How to rediscover a partner you know inside out
You know everything about your partner and somehow lost the spark. Here's how to rediscover each other without another heavy talk, one private swipe at a time.
How to keep surprising each other for years
Been together a decade and it's gone quiet? Here's how long-term couples keep surprising each other for years, without a big talk or a scorecard.
How to find out what your partner wants in bed
A shame-free, rejection-proof way to find out what your partner wants in bed without the loaded talk. You both answer honestly, and only see the overlap.
Why affection feels easy but sex feels impossible
affection feels easy but starting sex feels impossible because closeness and desire run on different fuel, and the move risks a no a hug never does.
A desire gap in a long marriage, and how to close it
A desire gap in a long marriage isn't a verdict on either of you. Here's how to close it by changing the conditions around wanting, not by pressuring anyone.
Rebuild attraction to a partner you love, no spark
You love them and feel no spark. Here's why desire and love drift apart over the years and how to find out if the attraction's still quietly there.
How to initiate sex without it feeling like begging
How to initiate sex without feeling like you're begging, when every 'not tonight' stings. A calmer, rejection-proof way back in for long-term couples.